If you’re uneasy and uncomfortable because the world is becoming a dangerous place, you’re not alone. It’s impossible to escape the news of horrific school shootings, the weather going wild, crazy politicians, war, and the economy. Any one of these things can trigger hopelessness and despair. But we’re faced with having to cope with all of this, every week right now.
And it’s easy to feel lost and hopeless when no place feels safe. And when you’re feeling lost and hopeless, loneliness can also begin creeping into your life. Then, before you realize it, you see how small and restricted your life has become.
Nothing that lights you up, you don’t find joy in the same things anymore, the people in your life are getting on your last nerve, and there’s no place to go to feel better.
Feeling Lost & Hopeless in Santa Fe, NM
When you’re feeling lost, you don’t have goals. There’s not much that you want to do or accomplish. It’s hard to find any reason that matters for slogging through the days. Meaning and purpose don’t even register. It’s like you’re treading water in a little plastic kiddie pool because you can’t see that the whole world is waiting for you.
Then, you feel hopeless since you don’t have goals because you can’t see any reason to get out of that kiddie pool.
The reverse can also be true — because you’re already feeling hopeless, sad, defeated, and depressed, you can’t see beyond the hopelessness. So you feel lost.
You can either be lost in hopelessness, or hopeless because of feeling lost. Make sense?
It takes a well-trained and experienced professional to help you understand what’s going on. It can be life-changing to have someone who can help you see what’s waiting for you on the other side of the fears and sadness, and who can teach you how to get out of the kiddie pool and into the world.
Feeling Worthless
Something else that can be present when you’re feeling lost & hopeless is feeling worthless. When you feel worthless, it seems like you’re not good enough. Nothing you do is right.
There’s a lot of hidden shame in feeling worthless. And that only makes you try harder to pretend things are OK, which contributes to feeling lost and hopeless. Because there’s a part of you that knows it’s not you, that you are good enough.
But that part isn’t very strong, so you keep telling yourself the toxic boss, invalidating partner, or learning experience you call failure means you’re worthless.
Some things that can make you feel worthless include …
- work that’s not satisfying,
- bosses and managers and co-workers who are mean or toxic,
- a setback, failure or change in career,
- after being cheated on,
- while you’re in a relationship (with someone who’s not good for you),
- after a breakup, or
- after divorce.
Feeling Hopeless to Help Someone You Love
Another reason for feeling lost & hopeless can be when you love someone caught in the trap of addictive behaviors. You keep trying to help them, but they don’t want the help. They can’t or don’t want to hear what you’re saying.
But you keep trying to talk with them, change their behaviors, and even threaten to leave. You keep saying, “OK, I’ll forgive you,” or “you’re right, I’m wrong, we’ll do it your way.” But they don’t change.
If it seems that you give too much to other people, but you don’t get much, or anything, back — that’s a sign of a unhealthy boundaries.
Are you the one who sacrifices at work, for others, your family, someone you love? Giving too much time, energy, and money is exhausting. You end up paying the price with your emotional, spiritual, physical, mental, and financial health.
The truth is that, at the end of the day, if you’re selling yourself out, you won’t be left with much except wondering where you went wrong and what happened to your money, choices, and your life.
Which will leave you feeling hopeless and lost and worthless, and full of shame. Please don’t wait to get help.
I’ve been there myself, and it cost me almost everything back in the day. It’s an ugly way to live, not to mention … damned expensive in every way.
What to do When the Future Feels Hopeless
Of course, you’re feeling hopeless and lost about the future — who isn’t?! It’s the new normal.
It’s looking really rough out there. You don’t have much control over large-scale, global events like war, climate change, or the economy. But you have a lot of control over what happens in your energetic heart and your mind.
When you learn to manage your thoughts, and understand how your thoughts can trigger emotions that cause actions and choices, you’re the one in charge. Not the thoughts and emotions.
And when you’re in charge of your thoughts, your mindset changes, and you begin positively affecting your life in all sorts of ways. You can work with crazy thinking, negative self-talk, and your monkey mind.
Therapies like CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy), DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy), ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy), narrative therapy, and positive, strengths-based psychology all have proven techniques to help you manage your mindset. And I’ve got advanced training in all of those techniques.
The Santa Fe Therapist Approach to Hopelessness
I’m Melanie, the Santa Fe Therapist, and I love working with women who feel lost, hopeless, and worthless. I understand how to help you move beyond despair and start engaging with life in whatever way you want. You’re here for important reasons — your life matters to the rest of us. We need you.
Profoundly positive things begin happening when you learn how to manage your emotions.
Together, we’ll figure out what’s going on and what you need to begin feeling more in control and less hopeless.
One of the most powerful ways to do that is to understand how your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors are intertwined. When you learn how to
- make friends with your feelings,
- manage your thoughts,
- explore new ways to view the world and manage your mindset and emotions in a safe setting —
- your life will begin changing in positive, healthy ways.
You can start believing in life again.
In balancing the science of therapy with the art of healing, I’ll create an innovative program for you that sets you on a path of success from the very first session.
My compassionate, creative approach weaves together my ability to hear below the surface of the words, advanced degrees, years of specialized training, professional experience, and my own personal healing around anxiety and overwhelm.
My clients usually work with me once a week for 8 to 12 months. As we work together, you’ll be getting tools for long-term success and learning and using strategies and techniques to serve you for many years.
You’ll work hard for sure. But won’t all be horrible and terrible! I love sharing ideas about good books and films and laughing together once in a while.
My hope for you is that you’ll feel safe every step of the way.
How to Get Help for Despair in Santa Fe, NM
You don’t have to struggle alone anymore with feeling overwhelmed, lost, and hopeless.
Counseling for feeling hopeless can make a world of positive difference in your life. When you reach out for help in Santa Fe, NM, you’re making an investment in yourself that can change in your life in the best of ways.
All you have to do is send me an email to schedule a free, 15-minute phone consultation: melanie@melanieharth.com. Let’s get you feeling better as quickly as possible.
The Santa Fe Therapist Offers Online Counseling in New Mexico
Online therapy helps women who don’t know who they are anymore find the time to calm their nervous systems. Online therapy helps you cope with challenges, and learn new coping strategies to use in between sessions.
I strongly believe in the power of online counseling. Along with the research that proves its effectiveness, I see the positive benefits for clients every week. If you’ve got questions about online therapy, please click here.
Other Services From The Santa Fe Therapist
The Santa Fe Therapist specializes in several areas of health, wellbeing, healing and recovery. One of my specialities is giving people the tools to cope with intense emotions.
I know that one size never fits all. My services are individualized to each client, and are based on your values, your needs and desires, and your goals.
I offer individual adult counseling and guidance in Santa Fe NM for:
- dealing with overwhelming angst and despair
- anxiety help
- depression help
- emotional and spiritual healing
- processing grief
- overcoming low self-esteem
- learning how to make peace with the present
- PTSD and CPTSD/trauma
- helping you manage stress
- online therapy